The Great Indian Examination....

RIght ...so here is another useless post after a long time...and the reason is :YUP..THOSE DAMN EXAMS!The Indian education system has all kinds of exams...exams like the quaterly..half yeraly...annual..and all other denominations in between.There are other very useful exams as well where kids show off their copying prowess...maybe who can hold 4 lessons 8 essays and 12 diagrams inside a small flap in their
underwear or who can effectively turn their head and cock their eyeballs at a precise anglse so as to look into the nearest nerd's exam paper....AH...the talent.All this latent
talent is shown off in leaps and bounds on writn answers on log books,question papers,erasers,the invigilators saree....so tht evry one can get a nice look in as she moves
around the class.Now that we have crossed the realms of these petty school examinations,we move on the grand daddy of all exams...THE BOARD EXAM.This 12 letter word will strike fear into any students heart as it is supposed to be an exam the "moulds" your career.Sometimes I wonder if mould means as in bread mould
as your career becomes all stale mouldy roten and you are now better off scratchin your butt at home rather than doin something more constructive.There are a plethora of board exams each governed by a different body..like the CBSE...ISC..and the different states in the country.Each kid has to face such exams twice
in his life and by the end of it ...his hair on his head as well other places must have gone a wee bit grey. Parents asking kids to study day in and day out..27 hrs a day..u
can even hear their advice echoing of the toilet bowl as ur spend sometime their in the wee hours of the morning. After that ordeal of scrwing up 5 papers and making an
absolute mockery of your life some wise guy has actually come up with other ways to ruin your life and make it as worthless as dried up rat poop in a platinum retail shop.Now that all of us have a clear IDEA on what we have to do in life either being a doctor and sellin kidneys so that you can get back that whopping capitation fee you
somehow have to pay after the 12th or wanting blossom into a useless engineer after churning out 4 years in a rat infested college[after which you would feel that you are
better off being the gay postman who delivered "mail"{no pun inteneded..;)} home] we confront may be the momma of the granddaddy of all exams...the ENTRANCE.There are so many entracne examinations....there is one for everythin and even if u wanna be a cobbler i think you have to pass an entrance with an elaborate syllabii of ionic equilibrium to the reprductive system of a guinea pig.I reiterate the point that there are A lot of entrances.To give u an idea..there is the AIEEE then there is the VITEEEthen you have the PMPD or if you are more jobless the IIT-JEE.A mathematically inclined mind would liek to think this as jus a buncha letters permuted in different combinations...if anyone of you have thought like that ..i guess you are
absolutely right. Now i ll take u through the things a kid will face during an entrance exam if he is REAL unlucky.BAD NEWS#-Lousy center:the first thing tht hits you after you get the hall ticket. Ofcourse if you have sent a gynandrous pic of yours they may have even changed your gender and
resized the pic and changed its colour and you think you are more a Cro-magnon man than wat u thot u wud b.....So if you center is lousy..ie...no hot girls or guys...[p.s depends on who is reading it and ur sexuality...take ur pic] and with lousy seats...cranky invigilators...and no
ventilation...the chances you clear it is already reduced by 50%#-Bad underwear: A very crucial cpart of any preparation..its not muggin up sinACosA=0.5Sin2A...naaa....its how to select the best undie fer the test.the correct mix of texture ...ventialtion and non itchiness is the key. Wrong selesction....ur chances are reduced by another 48% coz u can keep scratchin your groin and calucate the Youngs moudulus at the same time.#now tht u hav scrwd up so badly tht u can clear only by a slim margin of 2% and ur chances are literally hanging by a strand of pubic hair.....even the slightest error will screw you up and your mark has now gone where no score has gone before...THE NEGATIVES....so small things like bad body odour/breath of
the person sittin next to you...and other unforseen circumstances.So if u can just picture this situation....i think u can figure how unfortunate you can get.Well there is not much gud news during exam time ..and even if there is ....its magnitude will be as small as a schistosoma worms gonopore.hmm....i cant think of how to finish this off..and i usually dont like happy endings....but i guess the blog has injected some much needed vigour in our minds to not scrwe up
anymore exams but to totally let go of all hope like how we pee when our bladders our full and our micturition reflexes are off the chart...wishin you all the best of luck....OH BOY DONT WE NEED IT!!!!\m/